Stop

Before you even try, stop
No, that’s my answer, yes
Before you even open your mouth, quit
I feel your intentions more than I do my own identity
No, that’s my answer, yes

I fail to believe, because I did believe

‘I can make you laugh
I can make you smile
Forget about life for a while.’

‘I will help you fly
To a state of grace
In a world of chaos, let’s find a place.’

And tomorrow?
When I wake to a ghost
Physically absent
Emotionally unavailable
Will I find a wordless note
Or a blank look in your eye
That lessons me in what I did wrong

I fail to believe, because I did believe

‘I can help to set you free
Please just come and lay beside me
This begins your time to shine forever.’

‘You deserve to feel right
Your future can begin tonight
 Endless possibilities, just please take my hand.’

And yesterday?
When loneliness cracked my heart?
And empty dreams iced my veins?
Where were you? 
Plotting? 
Erasing?
Maybe even patronizing me?

I fail to try, because I did try

‘Don’t tuck yourself away
Just come and let’s try
Fill each other with love; it’s not the time to be shy.’

‘Accept me as real
And soon you will feel
What it’s like to be loved; what it’s like to be adored.’

And this very moment?
With your physical self just an arm’s length away
How familiar are you with your conscience, 
How familiar are you with your guiding light?
To get inside that head
30 seconds to read your thoughts
To liberate myself with your truths
Or bury myself with your lies
Just to reason with certainty
For anything is better than this.