In the Darkness

In the light, I am overwhelmed by this unexpected change, by this enormous loss.
I had not envisioned this season would be filled with destitution, inadequacy, and hopelessness.
I had planned for it everything…I was in control…I had a handle on it all…just not for this…just not for this.
This was not how this was supposed to go, and there is nothing I can’t undo what has been done.

 In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and raise my questions.
In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and confess my fears.
In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and seek your guidance.
In the darkness, I remember all you were and all you are as your love starts to warm me.

Because I do not understand means that this is the perfect time for us to get reacquainted.
I can allow your all-encompassing presence to sustain me through these long and restless nights.
You know all my doubts, concerns, and unease more intimately than I could ever hope to profess.
Amid it all, I know you will lift me up by showing me that your faithfulness is all that I need.

In the light, I can mindfully disregard the persistent reminders of a part of me that is forever lost.
I can combat the anger fueled by my inability to comprehend all that I lost in the blink of an eye.
I can thwart the rage that runs rampant through every vein, channel, and duct of my defeated body.
I can begin the grieving process and reach to gain a new perspective on this life-altering event.
 
In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and profess my doubts.
In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and admit my limitations.
In the darkness, I can meet you in the unknown and ask you to lead me.
In the darkness, I remember all you were and all you are as your love starts to warm me.